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Why I Want A Daughter - Embracing Womanhood & Parenting

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I’m currently pregnant with my second child!  My desire was for a girl that first go round, but God blessed with such an amazing young boy! I hav no regrets having a young man to lead and grow. I love you Jordan Wiggins ❤️ I am 5 months away from excruciating pain trying to birth the blessing God is trusting me with. Birth pains aren’t the only pain you grow through as a parent. The constant worry. The constant fear. The constant concern. Am I qualified for this? Am I ready for this? Can I afford this? Do I have enough space for another human to be added to my household size? Do I have the proper mental health and care to help raise a child to have a healthy mindset? So many questions. So many reasons to feel inadequate and insecure of the assignment. Being a parent is a life long assignment and can not be taken lightly.  As a woman who was once a baby girl who grew to a young woman and now becoming a full grown woman, I lacked many things that I see should be a priority for women. I g
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Accountability Is Not Shame

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 Many times I’ve spoken with others, and when accountability is addressed many people equate that to feeling shame. When we began to recognize some of our not so healthy or great traits within ourselves, a lot of times people will tense up and get stuck in the feeling of guilt that and that person will function in a shameful mindset. Many people confuse humility and seeing their flaws as a negative experience. The goal to recognizing and excepting our not so great traits is mostly for us to become self aware. And being self aware helps you become a better person internally. When you can see the areas that you are either lying to yourself, or lying to others or are not aware of, this is what helps you become accountable. It helps you call a spade a spade with yourself long before others can. It actually gives you a one up on the enemy.  Accountability IS a priority amongst leaders or at least should be. We are all created leaders in some way, shape or form. If you are a parent, you are
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You Do Not Have To be What People Label You As...

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 You're too much. You're too hard to deal with. You're crazy. You'll never amount to anything. You're lazy. You're difficult. You're a bad parent. You're too sensitive. You're aggressive. You're mean. You're unreasonable. You are uncivil. You are a thug. You are not accountable. You are ugly. You are fat. You are not compassionate. Your are selfish. You are greedy. You are a liar.  Their are so many labels in this world. So many people have an opinion. So many people have something to say. Make sure the words people speak over you or the words that get back to you are from a trustworthy person. This is very hard because wise counsel, honesty and correction is always needed. Yet, wise counsel, honesty and correction is very different from being labeled and put into a category or box by insensitive people.  A label is placed on something because that is where that name or title is being hosted forever or until the label is changed.  Many people
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Community Is A Necessity

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 This blog post is to help you understand the benefit of having people in your corner, having people you know and making yourself available to others.  Most of my life was spent alone. Fending for myself, making my own choices, self absorbed and that was out of survival. I didn't have the view of life as the glass half full, I didn't have the view of life as a glass half empty also. I had a view of a life as a broken glass and the contents in that glass seeped down a cold walkway as people walked on the pieces and heard the glass shatter only to be focused on their desires of their destination.  My view on life was not healthy. I felt I was that glass. And I silently seeped through the cracks of the sidewalk I would soon evaporate only for no one to notice me. I was very quiet, kept and to myself. I didn't have a voice. I didn't believe anyone cared for what I did acknowledge. I was looked over and the only acknowledgement there was when there was a task to be done that
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Loss (Feelings)

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 You never know how a prescence of something or someone can be such a support. When that presence is removed, you lose yourself for a moment. You begin to be someone else. You become weak. You feel lost. You just dont know... don't know anything, don't know anyone, you don't know yourself at times. Misunderstandings become law. Help becomes a disability. Hugs feel like betrayal. The words, "I love you" feels as if is not reality. Gossip and slander are the norm. Toxicity is clear. Anger seems as if it is the way. Trauma bonding is at an all time high. Disconnect lies at hand. Hurt rules the day while tears grow in the night. Fingers and toes are fueled by tingling anxiety. Support is distant. The person or thing that lent support, that helped you when you were down, that showed you love, that was a safe haven is now gone. A hole lays in your heart and every blow that is aimed at it seems to hurt immensely. Your heart feels withered. Your body aches. Your appetite
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Don't Neglect Yourself Focusing On Other People

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 Focusing on yourself is a full time job because you hold many areas of life. You are someone's daughter or son. You are someone's auntie or uncle. You are someone's employee. You are someone's CEO or Executive Director. You are someone's fiance. You are (possibly) someone's girl friend or boy friend or wife or husband. You are (possibly) someone's mother or father. You are (possibly) someone's roommate. You are possibly someones friend. You are possibly a leader in different areas and hold responsibility for a business or organization. There are so many roles you have responsibility for and that does not include who you are to yourself.  In these roles you have responsibilities and priorities. Putting people's needs before your own is apart of life, yet your main focus of needing yourself will be your demise or it will help you.  The main goal in life should be to serve (love) others and God. But if you are not in the proper mindset to do so, things
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Why Does This Generation Seek Prophesy So Much?

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 I chose to accept Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior around the age of 20. I knew about God and I liked churched as a child and attended a couple services a year throughout my upbringing. My family taught me things about God and some of those words stuck with me, but my own desires were a priority for a long period of time in my life. It wasn't until I turned 20 moved to Sacramento to live with and take care of my mom who became disabled and begin to seek Christ more.  I had a promiscuous past, dated and "hooked up" with men. God used a weakness of mine to actually provide me with great strength. He used a guy to share the knowledge of God with me. This guy I thought I would marry would soon exit my life 8 months later to marry someone else. God had him do what was needed to be done and removed him. What was needed to be done was me actually recognizing and getting to know God for myself. I needed to know God not from the point of what my family said to me, not
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